Join our band of brave space adventurers as they travel through the stars killing bad guys and making good guys feel a little uncomfortable. Also sometimes killing good guys. Set in a futuristic universe full of space battles, intrigue and sci-fi references, Espersito is a live play table top role play game. It is the first, and currently only, TTRPG podcast to use the Esper Genesis 5e system, which is based on and compatible with Dungeons and Dragons 5th Edition. All of this is done with a ...
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S3 Ep5: Trollllll in the Server!
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In the depths of the Forum Forrest, our team find themselves in a fight for their lives against the physical manifestation of a 00s Call of Duty lobby. Aaron struggles with how vile to make a troll, Mike’s rare nat 20s are underappreciated or stolen, and we find out who won the TTRG franchise wars in YET ANOTHER Espersito! Welcome to our Esper Gene…
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Separated by time, space, and water with an incredibly odd consistency, our party works to reunite in the Forum Forest, and make a new friend on the way (whom they proceed to freak out in record time). Join us as we play the timeless game (Skyrim), discuss Jon’s erstwhile VHS stockpile, and the Spill threatens to take in Spoodge in this sticky mess…
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S3 Ep3: Don’t Go Chasing Data Streams
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On a mission to find the Mothernode, our motley crew come across their first obstacle; a paywall they intend to treat with exactly the level of hostility a paywall deserves. We see our first glimpse of Mark Rylance Via Zuckerberg, obscure Community references of an obscure 90s tech thriller abound, and we throw some rope in Session The Third (of Se…
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Awakening in The Sim after a massive explosion, our characters receive a mission from god. Well, a god. Well, more of a cult leader. But he’s the god of one of those characters. Who’s in a cult. Confused? You Will be. Come along for the ride as we get a bit Dawkins and talk about religions as memes, refuse to face up to our newly found status among…
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Wake up babe, the hot new season of Espersito has dropped! An accidental family reunion in a rather unusual circumstances brings our merry band together for the adventure of their lives (which may prove to be very short indeed). We start as we mean to go on - with ample narrative interruptions, and a fine balance between gravitas and dick jokes in …
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S2 Ep58: Pull My Pinkie Part 8: The Dora-Vinci Code
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Having beaten the ‘mastermind’ of one of the worst birthday celebrations of all time, the team plan to ride off into the sunset, but only after retrieving Dora’s Pinkie form where the sun doesn’t shine. We question Dora’s due diligence skills, Jefferson “trouble shoots” a printer, Hudd plans to do combat in the greatest area of all - the small clai…
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S2 Ep57: Part 7: From the Ashes There Was Darren
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Room 101’s behind them, the birthday party party finally find themselves face to face with their malevolent host both ready to throw down and throw out some terrible one-liners. Mike voices his disappointment in our lack of erections (so far), we talk over a (somewhat confused) master-plan, and the GM’s clever use of traps is undone by facing a par…
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S2 Ep56: Pull My Pinkie Part 6: Cloning Around With Our Emotions
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From one traumatic experience into several others, our embattled gang find themselves flung through a series of tubes into individual rooms of their own unique hell’s. We discuss the boring game of monopoly, if Jon has too many dice, and experience Dumas using his supple nature in front of Rebook’s mother in this emotional battery of an episode of …
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S2 Ep55: Pull My Pinkie Part 5: Darrenpocalypse
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Freshly escaped from one room, and safe from one set of horrors, the party finds themselves in a mysterious corridor at the centre of the moon, and strides out to find a new set of horrors of their own making… We lament combat strategies that could have been, endure the ramblings of old men, make yet more silly decisions involving explosives, and a…
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S2 Ep54: Pull My Pinkie Part 4: Begun, The Clone Fight Has
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As the party travels, weak and weary, pondering Dora’s quaint and curious celebratory decisions… a noise comes, gently slapping. Slapping on the airlock door. Could it be the sound of a lonely bearded man, morosely pleasuring himself in the corner? Or perhaps, something worse? Some hideous ‘ballsack nosferatu’ squelching out of the shadows? Out of …
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S2 Ep53: Pull My Pinkie Part 3: Puzzles and Accidents
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Diving deeper into Dora’s twisted birthday games, our party are faced with puzzles, ‘party favours’, and an unfortunate amount of urine. Jefferson finds himself triggered by high explosives, cake biopsies are performed, we discuss tether fingers are ‘sticky’ or ‘tricky’, and one of the party finds themselves briefly the biggest penis in the galaxy …
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S2 Ep52: Pull My Pinkie Part 2: Clowns to The Left of Me, Murder Hornets to The Right
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Finding themselves with no option but to enter the cabin on the face of a desolate moon, the party finds themselves descending into a party. But are they motivated by concern? Or Revenge? Revenge. It’s definitely revenge. Wasps make whimsical purrs, we forget vital class features, and Mike uses his newfound GM rolling powers to bully Jon as we ente…
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S2 Ep51: Pull My Pinkie Part 1: Where in The World is Dora The Explorer?
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Welcome back, as we embark on a mini campaign / side-adventure / way for us to keep the RPG withdrawal shakes at bay whilst one of our number was on paternity leave. Join our cast of familiar faces (unless this is your first episode, in which case don't worry; you’ll soon get sick of them) as they tool up and embark on an adventure to… attend a bir…
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S2 Ep50: Strange New Worlds - Part 49 - Golden Rose, Golden Handshake, Golden Years
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With the galaxy saved by a particularly belligerent band of misfits, our bold adventurous tie off loose ends, say their goodbyes, and try and swindle as hefty a severance package as possible from the galactic powers. The crew of the Golden Rose head off into the golden sunset, in the finale for Season 2 of…. Espersito! Welcome to our Esper Genesis …
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S2 Ep49: Strange New Worlds - Part 48 - "I'm Molly F**king Weasley, B***h!"
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Deep into the heart of the crucible, our group of violent problem solvers come face to tentacled visage with the monstrosity threatening everything the crew of The Golden Rose have tried to save. We’re in the legally distinct endgame now. In combat with the BBEG in SPAAACE, distortion dice a-plenty are rolled, Rebook gets very chilly, Dumas gets ve…
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S2 Ep48: Strange New Worlds - Part 47 - That’s No Fairly Small Moon Sized Object...
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As the team make their way through enemies and into the heart of the Crucible, they must battle a horror from Hudd’s history. Through horrendous ice puns, ill advised assaults on architecture., and potential copyright strikes, the crew of The Golden Rose must find their way through polished, alien corridors, for the chance to see if Dumas has maste…
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S2 Ep47: Part 46 - Time For Some Docking, Lads!
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As battle rages around the Golden Rose, our incidental heroes must board The Crucible to find the force which threatens the galactic core. Join us as we discuss how docking is a delicate procedure, Tom learns he can't science everything, and elevator buttons blindside Jon again, in this elevator-music backed strip-tease of an episode of Espersito! …
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S2 Ep46: Strange New Worlds - Part 45 - Crackers Love Cheese!
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With plans for the assault on the Crucible finalised, the Golden Rose strikes forth towards the Eldori fleet with allies in tow. We bring up the adamantine bullets again, and get confused by alternate meanings of docking and Google frottaging getting Mike in trouble with his girlfriend. Dumas finds a NSFW way to keep calm before the battle ahead, w…
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S2 Ep45: Strange New Worlds - Part 44 - Kill My Daddy, Baby
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With Korchev dead and the fanatical Eldori Seventh Fleet blockading the crucible, our amateur negotiators must make a plan to attack the Xenoterum, and save the core. Join us, dear listener, as we flippantly discuss Mike’s potential real-life demise, get belligerent whilst levelling up, and discuss the Fabulous Spider-wank! Prepare to broadcast in …
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S2 Ep44: Strange New Worlds - Part 43 - But Soft, What Light Through Yonder Door-Breach Breaks?
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Two starfeets, both alike in dignity (In fair Silrayne Arc, where we lay our scene), From ancient grudge break to new mutiny, Where uncivil blood makes uncivil hands unclean. From forth the fatal loins of these two foes A pair of star-crossed lovers take their life; Whose misadventured piteous overthrows Doth with their death bury the galaxy’s stri…
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S2 Ep43: Strange New Worlds - Part 42 - Reach-around Ruckus
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As the ‘plan’ unravels, the gloves come off, and Hudd must quickly go from pacifist to pyromaniac as the crew enters combat with their captors. Join us as Aaron provides sage advice on drawing, Reebook engages in some testicular shattering crits, Hudd nuts a soldier senseless, and Dumas gets digitally fisted, and we get ready to rumble in… Espersit…
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S2 Ep42: Strange New Worlds - Part 41 - Wild Thangs
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After a helpful recap for Tom that confirms we did not visit an arboretum, our band of have-a-go heroes find themselves trying to negotiate a very physical barrier between them and their goal to save the admiral. Plans are panned, disguises are donned, we find new reasons to fear escalators, and figure out the differences between a Xamaron plant Ko…
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S2 Ep41: Strange New Worlds - Part 40 - The Negotiations Were Short
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Despite a surprisingly successful and almost non-violent infiltration, the crew must secure the control deck, and find a way to the bridge and save the admiral. Jon plans for the eventuality we get into a fight on the command deck, knowing full well it's a certainty, Hudd breaks and enters a quartermasters to grab a very compliant hostage, and Aaro…
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S2 Ep40: Strange New Worlds - Part 39 - Turrets Syndrome
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The jig is up as Dora finds herself on the receiving end of a rather unforgiving security system. Dumas gets salty as Hudd breaks the sacred agreement of the turn order, Dora makes a brain smoothie in an attempt to deliver non-lethal damage, and Rebook struggles with the moral dilemma (and potential mess) involved in killing a man with “discharge b…
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S2 Ep39: Strange New Worlds - Part 38 - Full Metal Racket
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What is your major malfunction, Dora? Having somehow successfully infiltrated the capital ship of the infinity corps, our motley crew face the very real challenge of trying to pass as a well oiled, competent, and highly disciplined military outfit. Naturally this draws us to sweep for computer porn, watch the ten minute epic that is Space Nuns, and…
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S2 Ep38: Strange New Worlds - Part 37 - Boom-Docking Saints
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Breach breach breach! Space turbulence and techie bullying abound as the team breaks into the São Paulo. One surprisingly successful space jump later, the party must overcome the nefarious GM’s puzzle that is an airlock, feebly attempt to subdue a door repairman, and take the next step in their ill thought out rescue / kidnap attempt. Doors are bud…
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S2 Ep37: Strange New Worlds - Part 36 - Space Men Can't Jump (ft. Lil Jon)
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The party prepare to yeet themselves into the cold void of space to kidnap an admiral; it’s a plan that might just be stupid enough to work… Jon hurts himself physically doing Pax’s voice again, whilst Pax hurts himself mentally dealing with newfound existential dread, and we discuss the boxed war crimes that are Space Apples. Prepare yourselves fo…
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S2 Ep36: Strange New Worlds - Part 35 - Don’t Be Afraid to Dream a Little Bigger, Darling
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Even with a blank cheque on the table, the players still find time to question the Esper Genesis pricing structures, whilst simultaneously breaking the economy. As the GM struggles with both the effects of spilling beer on his keyboard, and offering the party unlimited funds to spend in a military quartermaster’s (these events may be related); Duma…
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S2 Ep35: Strange New Worlds - Part 34 - Get Off My Zoom Call
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A familiar face from the history of The Silrayne Arc and The Silver Screen comes forward through the medium of video call, with new information for the crew of The Golden Rose, as they plot their next steps to save The Galactic Core. Our nominal heroes meet with Dora’s mysterious underground contact - ‘Filiais Flim Flam’ who reveals his true identi…
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S2 Ep34: Strange New Worlds - Part 33 - Improvise, Adept, Overcome
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The crew meet with scientists to discover more about the threats they face. Could it be Mesopotamian Mind Control Squids of Unenda? Or something even more sinister…? Amid terrible revelations about the fate of Dr Rich and Beltrov, Dumas discusses a traditional dwarven hero's welcome, Dora finds out what the scientist is drinking (and if it is piss)…
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S2 Ep33: Strange New Worlds - Part 32 - Pax Dramatica
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Part 32 - Pax Dramatica Further intrigue, and a familiar face on the Conclave flag ship; Daedalus. Having escaped the horrors of diplomacy, our adventures find themselves out of the frying plan, and into the other side of the iron curtain allegory (I’m bad at idioms, what do you want from me?). As the players kick off with an in depth discussion ab…
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S2 Ep32: Strange New Worlds - Part 31 - Yop For When Debriefing Come
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Happy 2021 everyone! Boy, if that doesn’t sound futuristic! It’s a shame it’s been one of those dystopian futures so far, but hey ho; here’s hoping this year gingerly steps over the exceptionally low bar set by 2020. The rift traversed, and back in realspace, our misfit bunch of miscreants make their way back to the Infinity Core for a far frostier…
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S2 Ep31: Strange New Worlds - Part 30 - Tug Boat Troubles
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Free from a Xamaron hive in chaos, our intrepid crew find themselves traversing the rift, and encounter a very unique salvage prospect. Join us as we level up, deal with exciting IT interface compatibility issues, and get lost in a word of confusing similes. Just what are the odds of rolling 100 on a d100? Find out in the exciting world of Espersit…
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S2 Ep30: Strange New Worlds - Part 29 - You Call These Bagels?
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One act of regicide ticked off the bucket list, the party make their escape towards the planet surface. Bruised, battered, and made physically ill by some questionable cuisine choices, the crew of the Rose must make their way back towards their ship and their salvation, as a recent change in government means that anarchy reigns the Xamaron hive. As…
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S2 Ep29: Strange New Worlds - Part 28 - TPKiller Queen
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These wasps have ruined our picnic for the last time… As Hudd ensures that the negotiations were short, the crew of the Golden Rose find themselves face to face with the Xamaron head honcho in a FAXE fueled fight for their lives. Hold onto your butts as we discuss the repressed condition, finally use the precious adamantine bullets, and get needles…
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S2 Ep28: Strange New Worlds - Part 27 - The FAXE of Life
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Having stocked up on some interesting goodies, the team comes across an opulent chamber at the centre of an ugly planet. Join us as we use the DM as a straw man to confront God’s machinations, we attempt to gain a sponsorship deal from a brand of super-strength Danish lager, discuss how Aaron is a naughty boy’s name, and even manage to be rude in c…
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S2 Ep27: Strange New Worlds - Part 26 - Rebook’s Roughnecks
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The crew face malignant wasps, and discover some potentially helpful gear as they delve deeper into the heart of hive. Dumas’ actions from the previous session are taken to kangaroo court, the team waste precious time discussing how to get down a hole (forgetting they have drones capable of flight), and disturbing revelations come to light regardin…
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S2 Ep26: Strange New Worlds - Part 25 - Offense Taken!
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After infiltrating the Xamaron hive, the crew face their greatest challenge yet: a long, girthy, cylindrical shaft. Join us as the party (and particularly their allies) have their day ruined by wasp-people and the unfortunate application of firepower; we bite the hand that feeds by pedantically over-analysing descriptions in the core manual; and Du…
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S2 Ep25: Strange New Worlds - Part 24 - It’s An Ugly Planet, A Bug Planet!
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A planet hostile to life... Having thoroughly killed Desire, our team makes planetfall to test their skills (specifically Athletics), and explore a pest control expert’s nightmare in search of a mysterious power source. Prepare yourselves for the excitement of traps, pitfalls, and planetary surveys, in the next installment of Espersito! Welcome to …
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S2 Ep24: Strange New Worlds - Part 23 - A Spaceshark Named Desire
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SHARK ATTACK! Just when they thought it was safe to go back into the uncaring void of space, our intrepid crew find themselves up against a foe that defies logic and the statistical chances of landing a hit. Witness the wonders of rift space, accountant based stealth drives, and disturbing dreams, as we get jawesome with another fintastic episode o…
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S2 Ep23: Strange New Worlds - Part 22 - Fighter Flights From Mars
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Having successfully secured a nav-computer, the gang must dogfight their way off-world, and into a rift. Whilst the players try to figure out the logistics of man to goose combat, join their characters as they engage in daring acrobatic feats to try and counter a wing of angry wasp-people… in spacecraft! Take the highway to the DANGER ZONE, as Aaro…
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S2 Ep22: Strange New Worlds - Part 21 - Salvage Wars
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The team head on a mission to Mars to obtain an important navigation device. With a ship upgraded and a new lead on the next step to halting a galactic invasion revealed, our crew set space-sail for the Sol system, and the red planet where Dora and Jimmo have historically engaged in some blue activities. Join us as we speculate on the whereabouts o…
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S2 Ep21: Strange New Worlds - Part 20 - Revisiting Core Characters
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Out of the diplomatic frying pan, into the cold war fryer. The crews of The Golden Rose and the HMS Dendus Ship (WIP) head to the core to try and make new allies (with an intriguing season one cameo) in their quest to save a homeworld… and the galaxy at large. Prepare to be baffled by Dumas’ lack of understanding of electronic messaging (and Dora’s…
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S2 Ep20: Strange New Worlds - Part 19 - Statecraft II: Wings of BLT
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With an attempt at vengeance foiled, the crew settle down for a hearty (or rather a heart-disease-y) breakfast and a day of politics. Jimmo’s culinary skills are put to the test as he serves up his speciality of BLTs (without the L, the T, or the bread - so just the B, really)*. As the Dwarves surely continue to question their selection of represen…
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S2 Ep19: Strange New Worlds - Part 18 - Revenge is a Dish Best Served Cold
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Having spoken with representatives of the Dendus as belligerently as might be expected, the crew attempt to both instigate and avoid another diplomatic incident, their real life counterparts speak of some minor treason, and hell hath no fury like a Promethean scorned. The cast would like to apologise to our Irish and Welsh listeners for any offensi…
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S2 Ep18: Strange New Worlds - Part 17 - A Starfleet is Born
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Prisoner management and politics collide in another exciting instalment of Espersito! With control of The Rose wrest from the villainous hands of Rickard Thorn (and returned to the marginally less nefarious hands of Dora), our protagonists make for the Dendus’ homeworld, and greater understanding of the insectoid menace. Join us as we try to offend…
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S2 Ep17: Strange New Worlds - Part 16: Kill for a Rose
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Swashbuckling shenanigans ensue as the crew battle to take a ship back from murderous pirates… so they can give it back to another murderous pirate. The Heroes of Unenda have narrowly escaped a debris field, and now find themselves face to face with Dora’s old crew. Mounting a questionably organised boarding action, our team must overcome suggestiv…
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We're a consistently irreverent podcast, but some things really do matter. Though we're just a bunch of idiots playing D&D (in space) and sticking the recordings on the internet for 'entertainment' purposes, this is something we all feel strongly about. In response to recent events, we'd like to release a brief message of support and solidarity. An…
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S2 Ep15: Strange New Worlds - Part 15: Adam and The Antine Bullets
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The crew stock up and fly out on a (poorly kept) secret mission. In the latest episode of Espersito, the GM wastes a beautiful voice on a one-off character during a shopping spree, Dumas attempts questionable crafting techniques to produce some special ammunition, and Dora meets an old friend with incredibly thematic naming conventions. Join us as …
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S2 Ep14: Strange New Worlds - Part 14: The Chewbacca Effect
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Dumas, Hud, Dora, and Rebook return to the Dwarven flotilla as somewhat unlikely heroes. Having saved more lives than they could ever have imagined, our crew of adventurers must now embark on an even more dangerous mission, with even more at stake. Celebrations are thrown, candidates for medals are snubbed, shady dealings go down, and a meteoric (a…
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