A comedy podcast that exposes the absurd side of folklore. Each week we read a story, fix plotholes and create new ones, and invent unintended connections between tales.
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Episode 432: THAT DIDN'T ANSWER MY QUESTION AT ALL (What the Rose Did to the Cypress, Part III)
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This week we conclude the twisting, turning road that is What the Rose Did to the Cypress, with and even the story is sick of itself by the end. Suggested talking points: No Secrets When There's Breadsticks on the Line, Final Butt Diamond, Taking Baths With Strange Deer, Marriage In Exchange For Advice, Run-Of-The-Mill Sludge Prince, Miscellaneous …
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Episode 431: Livin' on Deer Time (What the Rose Did to the Cypress, Part II)
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This week we continue our puzzling journey into What the Rose Did to the Cypress, but we take a bit of a detour away from riddle-solving in order to gather snacks, learn nothing, and kill hundreds of thousands of men. Suggested talking points: A Human Hand Clap, Backseat Riddlers, Men of a Indeterminate Age, An Alternate Pant-Leg of Time, This is D…
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Episode 430: The Proper Channels (Which is Warfare) {What the Rose Did to the Cypress, Part 1}
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This week we begin our journey into What the Rose Did to the Cypress, a story featuring a riddle so enticing, even knowing it exists drives men to their (countless) deaths. Suggested talking points: Magnet Highway, The Folklore Ice Bucket Challenge, Horticultural Beef, The Sordid Inner-Lives of Garden Folk, I'm Tired of Hunting this Town, Ctrl+F "F…
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Spooklore 2024 draws to a close with a reading of The Story of a Mother, which is not so much a spooky story but a terribly depressing one, from resident sad-sack, Hans Christian Andersen. Turns out, the true horror was videogames from 1993 this whole time! Suggested talking points: The Hamburglar's Living Conditions, A Cave with Amenities, Microwa…
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Episode 428: Please Bloodborne My Daughter
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Spooklore 2024 continues with a reading of The Legend of the Pineapple, a story that either pushes fruit to new spooky echelons, or is a big coincidence. It's impossible to tell which. Suggested talking points: Spooky By Implication, Painfully Competent, Cooking is a Myth, Waiting to Magically Become Not Terrible, Porridge Was an Ask Too Far, The S…
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Episode 427: The Wolf-to-Corgi Pipeline
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Spooklore 2024 continues with a reading of Men-Wolves, a three-act story about a Witch who just can't get her one spell to work right. Suggested talking points: Ol' Gloomy NotJohn, Got the Wolf Quivers, Magic Pants Feelings, Tobias Fünke's Furry OC, Like Sailor Moon if Sailor Moon Sucked, You've Got Wolf Starring Tom Hanks If you'd like to support …
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Spooklore 2024 begins with readings of both The Book of Magic and The Willful Child, two tales selected for their strong connective tissue to one another, and certainly not for their brevity! Suggested talking points: Bonesblood City Magicbook, Pandering to the Spooktralizer, Dracula and Buddies, A Greater Concentration of Diabolicalness, Fill Your…
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Episode 425: Raised on a Diet of Vengeance
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This week we're reading The Death of the Sun Hero. Did you know there's an ancient pact that spurs all newborns to begin crawling towards the same point on earth, all in an effort to murder a single man? Apparently only the Sun knew that. Suggested talking points: Kebob a Rhino, Naked 'n Stuff, Sex Dolls for Cats, A Horse on Cocaine, An Infant with…
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Episode 424: Another Win for Big Big Rock
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This week we're reading The Origin of Stories, which I guess is a pretty big deal, considering the premise of this show. Suggested talking points: Envision Yourself Mong-ing, The Deep Etsy, Firstname Inanimateobject, CTRL+F "Goose", Stones Crave Birds, An Orphan Named Orphan If you'd like to support Carman's artistic endeavors, visit: https://www.p…
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Episode 423: A Hunger for Evil and Cash
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This week we're reading The Wicked Prince, a deep dive into the possibility-space of whatever the hell Hans Christian Andersen's personality is. Suggested talking points: Purple Prose Kiss Orgy, The Worst Coin, Hundreds of Strong Eagles, Big Bad Bullet Button, The Gnat Medal of Honor, A Possibility of a Personality If you'd like to support Carman's…
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Episode 422: The Emperor's New Ding-Dong
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It's time for our First-Annual Daughter-Off! This week we're reading The Great Bell, in order to compare and contrast the daughters of this and last week's tales. We also learn a LOT about jugglers on the way, for some reason. Check out Gordie's new Kickstarter! Suggested talking points: Secret Pidgeon App, Tuckered Out From the Head-Hitting, The B…
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First off, big congratulations to Gordie for achieving the fastest fully funded project on Kickstarter in the site's history. Don't believe me? Well just click the link below and see for yourself! Anyway, we also read The Strange Tale of Doctor Dog, whom we almost immediately eminent-domain for our own purposes. Check out Gordie's new Kickstarter! …
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Episode 420: Corn, Lies, Hijinks, Bird Terror, Bones and Blood (Aztec Creation Myths Part 2)
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After a brief-but-crucial PSA, and a short check in on the modern AI hellscape we all call the internet, we return our attention to finishing last week's Aztec Creation Myths. Check out Gordie's new Kickstarter! Suggested talking points: The Chuck E. Cheese of Gas Stations, Deceiving Faster Than We Can Think, An Animal That Can Throw a Punch, White…
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Episode 419: Jaguars Solve All Problems (Aztec Creation Myths Part 1)
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This week we spend much too much time complaining about the Disney corporation before turning our attention to some Aztec Creation Myths. Turns out this isn't even the first Sun our planet had back in the space-goop days! Neat! Check out Gordie's new Kickstarter! Suggested talking points: A Cupcake for Every Occasion, Terminally Tumblr, Floating in…
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Episode 418: Pneumatic Baby Bullet
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Due to recording this week on World Chocolate Day, we of course had to check in on how Willy Wonka's retirement is going. After that brief aside, we read The King of Love, who in a shocking twist, is none of those words. Check out Gordie's new Kickstarter! Suggested talking points: A Circle of Bread, Willy Wonka's Retirement, A Surprising Dearth of…
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"It was never corn you feared, my child. It was destiny that frightened you." Check out Gordie's new Kickstarter! Suggested talking points: Interpretive Threats, A Benadryl Situation, A Cruel and Dangerous World of Endless Picnics, Princesses Priced to Move, Animal Sopranos, Baba Does as Yaga Wants If you'd like to support Carman's artistic endeavo…
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Episode 416: My Mother IS Pagliacci
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This week on WTFolklore, we read My Mother is a Cat. Who knew there was such a plethora of moms out there ripe for the picking, if you just had the courage to ask them to be your mom instead of your current mom, who is a cat. Check out Gordie's new Kickstarter! Suggested talking points: Technically Functioning, Toilet Is Forever, The Segue Klaxon, …
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Episode 415: A Deleted Scene from The Brave Little Toaster
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We tackle another Chromatic Dwarf story this week, The Little Gray Man, from Andrew Lang's Fairy Books. It takes some unexpected twists, landing us squarely in the realms of DOUBLE FICTION. Check out Gordie's new Kickstarter! Suggested talking points: Happy World Sea Turtle Day, House+, Plotmosphere, Lotto Tickets in the Leaves, Extra-Dimensional W…
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Episode 414: The Horse Who Only Chooses Violence
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This week we cover the tale of Dapplegrim, the only named character in his story. And rightly so, as he's the most terrifying horse to ever live. Check out Gordie's new Kickstarter! Suggested talking points: Accidental Estate Sale, Schrödinger's Vacuum, Investing in a Future Brag, The Money Laundromat, Addicted to Milk, Rad By Association, Echoes o…
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Episode 413: Very Almost Smart
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After her daring escape from what is almost certainly a fae-managed Kroger, Carman regales us with the story of The Serpent Prince, which claims to come from Italy, but...well you be the judge. Check out Gordie's new Kickstarter! Suggested talking points: Entreprenordie, The Insatiable Desire to Punk Everything, Fairy Ring Grocery Store, Foxpower E…
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Episode 412: The Best at Getting Robbed
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This week we, and by extension you, are treated to The Epic Farts of General Pumpkin. I dunno what else you want from me on this one, it's all on the tin. Suggested talking points: The Rabbit-to-Bear Pipeline, Sit Down and Enjoy the Gas-Humor, Pumpkin Popeye, The Last Fartbender, Flatulent Forest Gump, Fartial Arts, General Pumpkin's Pumpkin Cookbo…
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We return to the welcoming, warm blanket of Fairytalez With a Z Dot Com to read about The Half-Chick, an Origin Story that really didn't need to be. Suggested talking points: Load-Bearing Cereal, Chicken Broth Nightcap, Just a Hint of Feather, Soliciting Help From the Ground, Victor Hugo's Dark Souls If you'd like to support Carman's artistic endea…
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Well, this seems familiar...Oleh What the Folklore
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This week on WTFolklore, we turn our attention to The Toad Woman, a Native American tale of unrecorded origin. With a name like that you'd figure she'd be pretty interesting, but, uh, there are a number of other intriguing entities this week as well. Suggested talking points: The Original Team Rocket, Too Hot for Poe, Old Lady Moccasin Pit Crew, He…
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Episode 409: The Backpack of Dorian Gray
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This week on WTFolklore, we read The Goose Girl at the Well, A Grimm Brothers' tale that has absolutely nothing to do with any previously mentioned Goose-Women on our program. Apologies for any audio hiccups, we had some very strange glitches this week that I've cleaned up the best I can. Suggested talking points: An Hour of Consciousness, Dragon B…
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Looks like them anime boys are at it again!Oleh What the Folklore
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Episode 408: A Mysterious Fellow with a Slight Cherry Scent
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This week on WTFolklore, we read Nani Daughter of Nani, A Palestinian story who's title omits a FASCINATING detail about said character. You'll have to listen in to find out for yourself. Suggested talking points: Decorative Digital Monkey, The Algorithm Used to be a Guy, Rock-Pocket Memory Palace, An Ill-Fated Cereal Promotion, Prehensile Rapunzel…
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Episode 407: The Think-About-What-You've-Dungeon
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This week we read The Enchanted Ring. No, not that one, the other one, from Russia. This obviously means we had to infuse it with some timely, seasonal holiday flair of our own. Suggested talking points: Blarney Day, Peasant is a Mindset, An Island in a Sea of Reasoning, Ruble-to-Dog Exchange Rate, Master Ninja Carpenters, There Are No Mysteries in…
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Episode 406: Middle-Manager-Slash-King Tiger
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This week we read The Tiger King's Gift. No, not that one, the other one, from India. We actually meet a trinity of animal kings, so we encourage you to tag yourself among them. Suggested talking points: Time Crime, Enter the Month Zone, A More Wholesome Rage, A Well for Men, Living the Death Stranding Life, Terms of Genie Services, Inflation on th…
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Episode 405: A Blackbelt in Royalty
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This week we read The Bird Catcher, from Serbia. It features either the very best or the very worst agent of Project Birdfall. We'll let you decide which. CONTENT WARNING: Infrequent, but repeated mentions of domestic violence. Suggested talking points: BYONut, Bird Concerts are Canceled, Ruining Lives For Fun, The Senile-o-Meter, Redefining Mischi…
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Episode 404: Waiting Room Simulator 2024
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This week we read The Shepherdess and the Chimney Sweep, another banger from Hans Christian Andersen. It doesn't do much to disrupt it's own status quo by the end, but boy are there some twists along the way. Suggested talking points: A Proud Line of Highly Skilled Dishwashers, Big Hoof: Sasquatch of the South, Peppers That Learn English, Invest In…
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This week WTFolklore reads The Story of the Old Man Who Made Withered Trees to Flower, a Japanese story that demonstrates the perils of being TOO nice to someone, and the perils of being TOO stupid for niceness to be done unto you. Suggested talking points: The Baby-to-Grandparent Pipeline, The Job of Dog is Win Food, Cool Prank, Planet Earth, The …
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Episode 402: My Horse is Dead and the Toilet's Clogged
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This week we read The Flower Queen's Daughter, which transitions naturally from a PSA about egg consumption protocols to a Ye Olde retelling of Scott Pilgrim. Suggested talking points: Redemption Arc University, The AI-niverse, An Exercise in Broken Promises, Karate Fighting a Ditch, Midnight Egg Demands, Prince Grindset, Cordially Captured, Even M…
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This week WTFolklore reads two tales of similar structure, The Apples of Pregnancy and The Three Princesses and the Unclean Spirit. Turns out when you get your boys from apples, they ain't normal boys no more. But they ARE very capable infants. Suggested talking points: I Miss Boat, A Non-Stop Flood of Tom and Jerry Content, One Punch Jr., A Very M…
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Episode 400: WTFolklore, Now on LaserDisc!
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We have arrived at what is definitely our 400th episode (excluding a bunch of additional recordings that simply don't count). Such a momentous occasion requires a momentous surprise. Thanks to (lil') Geri for joining us! Suggested talking points: Fallen Carpet Paladin, Corn Wearing a Bib, The Bedtime Onion Threshold, The Blobfish of Phrases, Uncle …
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This week we read The Plague Omen, a Polish tale that, on one hand, is about 4 years too late, but on the other, probably wouldn't have changed much if we're honest. Suggested talking points: Flex the Germs Off, Tummy Dentist, A Secret Auction With Yourself, Stank-Free Tales, Requiescat in Fauci, Can't Go Back to the Rat Shack If you'd like to supp…
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Episode 398: Piss Soup is Not the Way to Repay a Favor
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WTFolklore kicks off 2024 by reading Tsuru no Ongaeshi and several of it's variants, giving you a veritable zodiac wheel of animal wives to choose from! Suggested talking points: The Gradual Descent Towards Something, The Most Secret Best Known Folktale Award, A Grab-Bag of Human Parts, Posture Correcting Underpants, Furry Waifu Starter Kit, Eyes F…
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Episode 397: Tips on How to Defeat a Child
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Rounding out the year 2023, we read the two wintery tales, The Little Girl and the Winter Whirlwinds and The Yule Buck and the Girl, to jam-pack as much WTFolklore in as we can before the holidays. You'll also learn an awful lot about Kellogg's cereal. Suggested talking points: Not an Ideal Wolverine, Pac-Man Fitness Tape, Smash Glass if Bugs and D…
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Episode 396: Cream of Water Soup
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This week on WTFolklore we read the Brazillian tale, Why the Sea Moans, which is obviously a well-known phenomenon and not just a made up excuse to tell another bizarre Cinderella-like. Suggested talking points: December Ants, Zynnergy with a Z, Tim Slurry, Return of the Math Corner, The Ocean Learns to Annunciate, Politely Ghosting a Princess, Han…
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Episode 395: Hallmark Movie Event Horizon
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This week on WTFolklore after some brief forays into the worlds of toilets and Hallmark movies, which ARE different, we read The Cat that Walked by Himself, certainly for the first time ever. We learn some uncomfortable truths about the sitcoms that are our lives, and the marketing acumen of our feline friends. Suggested talking points: Pork and Ap…
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Episode 394: The Constellation of Meats
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This week on WTFolklore we read The Fairies of the Waterfall, which inadvertently helps to clue us in on the diabolical modern-day machinations of the Fae. Suggested talking points: Vivid Nighttime Idea Hallucinations, A Big "We", Practical Laundry Math, Infrared Flags, Mandala Death Messenger, A Ham-Themed Year, Lorem Ipsum Lagoon, If you'd like t…
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Episode 393: New and Unforeseen Miseries
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We've made it to the spookiest day of the year! Enjoy our retelling of The Blacksmith's Stool: The Story of a Man Who Found That Death was Necessary Suggested talking points: GPS as a Statement Necklace, Freaky 2:30 to 4:30, Give the Stool a Chance, Forever Staycation, Spa Day in Space, Quarterly Ani-Devil Training, Diet-Death, Tinnitus of the Tong…
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Episode 392: A Vibrant Picture of a Life in Shambles
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This week for Spooklore, we learn about Herne the Hunter, a man so baller in life that it was inevitable he'd be just as baller in death. Suggested talking points: Build-A-Backstory, Some of Us Have Brigands to Fight, The Most Recent Ghost, Just Lads Being Mates, Best at Woods, Best at Ghost If you'd like to support Carman's artistic endeavors, vis…
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Episode 391: Innocent Until Proven Vampire
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This week for Spooklore, we tell the tale of The Loss of Jacob Hurd, though in reality the tale is less about Jacob, and more about his own son's ghost-vengeance on his hassle of a father. Thanks to Dave for joining us again! Suggested talking points: Industrialized Curse Complex, Some Of These Words Are Just Vibes, The Girl-Child Iceberg, Dante's …
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This week for Spooklore, we eventually get around to telling a Polish folktale, The Demon's Dance, but first we ask that you Descend into a societal horror with us. Thanks to Theo for joining us again! Suggested talking points: Plato's Cave of Corporatocracy, Knife: Mint in Box, High Mischief Tolerance, The Pope Store on Pope Island, Cutcotaku, An …
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Episode 389: Ancient Chinese Sharknado
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Kicking off Spooklore once more is the return of the Journey West. Certainly not as body-horror-y as last years entry, but still enough Halloween flavor to whet the appetite. Suggested talking points: Herald of Mischief, The Ultimate Trick-Or-Treater, One Measly Murder, Pickled Horse, Dunkin' Infestation, Nature's Most Camaflouge Animal, Beanie Bab…
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Episode 388: Filthy John's Big Thinkers Vol. 2
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This week on WTFolklore, we read The Riddle. That's something of a misnomer, as no riddles appear whatsoever. But there are plenty of personal anecdotes to be had. Suggested talking points: A Satisfying Scrunch, An Anecdote-Proof Life, Giant Dog Emporium, BYOBubble, Code Scheherazade, The Great Squander Games, The Sphynx Detox If you'd like to supp…
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Episode 387: Ms. Fieldmouse's Wiki Battleground
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This week WTFolklore reads Forest Bride: The Story of a Little Mouse Who Was a Princess, which very succinctly sums up what you should expect to hear about. In addition to more single-panel Facebook Comic Strip Audiobooks, of course. Suggested talking points: Maybe We're the Poops, Rank the Boys, Go Away My Sons, High-Stakes Parking Garage, Cheesec…
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Episode 386: That Bird is My Dad
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This week on WTFolklore is the follow-up story to last week, titled How Ball Carrier Finished His Task, and, listen, we MAY have been a little overzealous in our endorsement of a certain witch last week... Suggested talking points: Museum Of Things You Walk On, The Age of Windbreakers, Pigeon Beats Wolf, The Speed of Couch, Bonked to Death, Cried a…
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Episode 385: The Empty Void of Human Creativity
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This week on WTFolklore, we read the Unattributed Native American tale, The Ball Carrier and the Bad One, which features a confusing training montage, distressingly terrible plans, and a shocking sequel hook Suggested talking points: Escape from the Chaos Zone, A Pokeball for Children, Booster Pack of Wolves, Simply Shriek Until Things Get Better, …
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