Seeking Other People's Approval: How to Change Your Perspective

19 Year Old Shrink

In this episode, I discuss something we have all struggled with at one time or another; caring about what people think. And sometimes it's good to care about what people think, because they are doing it in your best interest. One example of this discussed in the episode involves cheating on a test, and your friend telling you it's not the right thing to do. Being open minded to your friends advice and realizing that habit needs to end is important. But, where we get into trouble is changing who we are in a negative way based on what others are telling us to do.
And in these situations, most of the time it's based on perception of what people will say, rather than them outright telling you to do something that goes against you as a person. Examples include fearing what people will think of your post on social media, rejection, changing personality based on different groups of people, and drinking at parties. Of course, outright criticism of who you are still manifests itself in disapproval of career path, life partners, and your overall success.
As the episode progresses, I provide multiple solutions to help handle situations of peer approval when they come up. One is becoming familiar with people's opinions you have cared about in the past, and realizing many of those people are no longer in your life. After realizing this, you can approach your relationships with a future oriented mindset and be more at ease with being yourself around people. And also recognizing that people aren't thinking about you, they are thinking about what you're thinking about them. This is something that will help you every single day and completely change your perspective of other people. If peer approval is something that has impacted you, definitely recommend giving this episode a listen!