Christian Mingle: Episode 88 Pure Boys: A Heartland podcast

1+ y ago 1:09:57

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Finally a movie that teaches us how to find TRUE LOVE in this modern age of 2014!

Step 1: Lie about yourself on Christian Mingle

Step 2: Meet a good Christian boy and beg him to kiss you on the first date

Step 3: After 1-3 dates, fly to Mexico to help his family hang a bell in a church that was destroyed... also your lies are discovered and you get dumped

Step 4: Decide to completely overhaul your life for this guy and start going to church and reading the Bible. Do this for about a week

Step 5: Reunite with the guy (who has moved on), trash talk his new girlfriend and humble brag about what a good Christian you are (for the past week)

Step 6: Get denied (what are you, dating the apostle Peter?)

Step 7: Go crazy and talk to God in the middle of the street or by yelling out your window

Step 8: Quit your job, move to the Mexican village the guys family volunteers in all the time and get to know his parents/make his family love you

Step 9: Keep wearing your Commifornia clothing including wedges. Really rub it in the poor Mexicans faces that you have money

Step 10: For no reason the guy will decide to take you back

Success!

David A.R. White, Tyler Perry or the Kendrick Brothers hit us up anytime for that sponsorship. We love you!

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180 episode