A Single Mom and a Force of Nature with Guest Author Lorraine Duffy Merkl. LOOKING BACK AT S2E42

Should Have Listened to My Mother Podcast

I wanted to give you an update on Lorraine's mom, since our original publication of the episode was in November, 2021. Lorraine's mom, Angelina, passed away in March 2023, at 100 years old. And Lorraine let me know that it was taking some time to adjust to not having her mom with her by her side. Lorraine took care of her mother for many, many years.

I'm also attaching a copy of Lorraine's NY Times "Tiny Love Story," writing submission which was published in September 2021.

NY TIMES "TINY LOVE STORY" : 9.19.21 "Our First Days"

In some pre-fall cleaning, I waded through more than 2,500 family photos. Only one made me cry. It wasn’t the image of me in my parochial school jumper but my mother’s note on the back of that picture: “Oct. 1964. Lorraine first grade. My first day of work.” She became a single mother when I was 2. After years out of the work force, she returned as a telephone company operator. Many of the employees were younger. My mother must have been scared. But she did it for us, and in 1984, she retired as an executive at the same company. — Lorraine Duffy Merkl

Once Lorraine and I agreed on a date and time to record the interview, I started doing more research on her background and experience. On her website, http://lorraineduffymerkl.com/, I found one of her demo reels from way back when she was writing and producing promos for a number of different tv networks. As I'm listening to one of her promo reels, I thought I heard something that sounded vaguely familiar. On her promo reel for Lifetime Television was my voice over featured on at least 3 of her promos. It turns out we had worked together back in the early to mid to late 90's and neither of us recalled meeting, let alone working together. I was in the recording booth and she in the master control room. We were both in awe and thanking the universe for bringing us back together. This time I was interviewing Lorraine and asking her the questions.

Now on to the the real story of Lorraine and her mother Angelina. Angelina raised her only daughter, Lorraine, as a single mom after her husband left when Lorraine was only two years old. Yes, she had the help of her mother, Lorraine's grandmother, but it wasn't easy. We all know that it's tough being a single parent. But after seven years of being out of the work force, scared and nervous, mom went back to work taking an entry level position as an operator at a phone company at the age of 42. Angelina had never gone to college yet retired decades later as an executive from that same company.

"My mom was a member of the Greatest Generation, she experienced the Depression and poverty, went back to work though frightened and did all of this so my life would be easier," says Merkl. "Together we can fight over anything or standup to anyone," reflects Lorraine.

In time, Angelina would reveal things to her daughter saying "I was holding on by a thread." In order for Angelina to keep things organized at home, she felt that she had to be tough and discipline her daughter. Lorraine feels that her mom was "operating off of fear all the time." Again, it's understandable when your husband walks away and leaves you to raise your daughter .

Lorraine so admires her mother, "being apart brought us closer together," reflects Merkl. At 24 years old, after having moved out on her own, she and her mother became friends and so enjoyed each other's company. "She was a giver, not a taker, helpful and kind.

At the time of this interview, Angelina is living with and being cared for by her daughter. She is 98 years old and suffering from dementia. My guest has so many wonderful memories of her mother, including advice for her to "stick up for yourself," "mom always wanted me to be somebody who could stick up for themselves," says Lorraine.

Don't let anyone fool you. Angelina is one of 13 children of an Italian family and raised in the Bronx, NY. She was very smart as well as being very street smart.

"Should Have Listened To My Mother" is an ongoing conversation about mothers/female role models and the roles they play in our lives. Jackie's guests were open and honest and answer the question, are you who you are today because of, or in spite of, your mother and so much more. You'll be amazed at what the responses are.

Gina Kunadian wrote this 5 Star review on Apple Podcast:

SHLTMM TESTIMONIAL GINA KUNADIAN JUNE 18, 2024

“A Heartfelt and Insightful Exploration of Maternal Love”

Jackie Tantillo’s “Should Have Listened To My Mother” Podcast is a treasure and it’s clear why it’s a 2023 People’s Choice Podcast Award Nominee. This show delves into the profound impact mother and maternal role models have on our lives through personal stories and reflections.

Each episode offers a chance to learn how different individuals have been shaped by their mothers’ actions and words. Jackie skillfully guides these conversations, revealing why guests with similar backgrounds have forged different paths.

This podcast is a collection of timeless stories that highlight the powerful role of maternal figures in our society. Whether your mother influenced you positively or you thrived despite challenges, this show resonates deeply.

I highly recommend “Should Have Listened To My Mother” Podcast for its insightful, heartfelt and enriching content.

Gina Kunadian

"Should Have Listened To My Mother" would not be possible without the generosity, sincerity and insight from my guests. In 2018/2019, in getting ready to launch my podcast, so many were willing to give their time and share their personal stories of their relationship with their mother, for better or worse and what they learned from that maternal relationship.

Some of my guests include Nationally and Internationally recognized authors, Journalists, Columbia University Professors, Health Practitioners, Scientists, Artists, Attorneys, Baritone Singer, Pulitzer Prize Winning Journalist, Activists, Freighter Sea Captain, Film Production Manager, Professor of Writing Montclair State University, Attorney and family advocate @CUNY Law; NYC First Responder/NYC Firefighter, Child and Adult Special Needs Activist, Property Manager, Chefs, Self Help Advocates, therapists and so many more talented and insightful women and men.

Jackie has worked in the broadcasting industry for over four decades. She has interviewed many fascinating people including musicians, celebrities, authors, activists, entrepreneurs, politicians and more.

A big thank you goes to Ricky Soto, NYC based Graphic Designer, who created the logo for "Should Have Listened To My Mother".

Check out our website for more background information: https://www.jackietantillo.com/

Or more demos of what's to come at https://soundcloud.com/jackie-tantillo

Link to website and show notes: https://shltmm.simplecast.com/

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