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Curated Questions: Conversations Celebrating the Power of Questions!

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Ashley Kirsner 1:40:41

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Episode Notes [00:00] The Power of Vulnerability [01:57] Meet Ashley Kirsner [03:55] The Impact of Active Listening [05:02] A Transformative Call [06:25] The Magic of Open-Ended Questions [13:28] The Role of Basic Needs in Emotional Well-being [17:10] The Birth of Skip the Small Talk [25:18] The First Skip the Small Talk Event [28:39] The Evolution of Skip the Small Talk [32:56] Online Events During COVID-19 [34:58] Work At An Anxiety Lab [38:08] The Importance of Positive Questions [42:40] The Power of Repeated Questions [45:33] Attending a Skip the Small Talk Event [46:14] The Speed Dating Format [47:21] Encouraging Anxious Participants [48:45] The Power of Sharing Deeply [49:32] Consistent Findings on Vulnerability [50:13] Understanding Oversharing [51:11] Structure and Time Management [52:18] Facilitators and Norms [53:12] Contact Information Norms [55:06] Intentional Iteration and Safety [56:37] The Role of Participants [59:01] Financial Accessibility and Investment [01:00:43] Balancing Accessibility and Compensation [01:01:49] Compensating Facilitators [01:04:39] Physiological Benefits of Deep Conversations [01:07:00] Research on Loneliness and Connection [01:09:02] The Impact of Loneliness on Health [01:10:41] The Role of Sleep in Connection [01:13:42] The Importance of Group Interactions [01:15:10] The Power of Intentional Conversations [01:20:26] Learning from Gathering Experts [01:23:19] Right Now Question & Following Curiosity [01:30:18] Where You Can Find Skip The Small Talk [01:35:45] Takeaway Thoughts & Questions Resources Mentioned Skip The Small Talk Chris Voss Finding Good with Brian Fretwell Dr. Nicholas Epley DBT - Dialectical Behavioral Therapy Brene Brown How We Gather by Priya Parker Power of Ritual by Casper ter Kuile How We Gather by Dr. Angie Thurston - Harvard Divinity School Death of Rasputin Harvard Graduate School of Education Harvard Wharton Business School MIT GE Aviation Act Blue Beauty Pill Producer Ben Ford Questions Asked When did you first understand the power of questions? How would this possibly work? What are we doing here? How could this possibly be effective? What is it that asking questions actually does for us? In this deep end of the pool, for what you experience as a suicide hotline counselor, what does that look like? How did that impact you? Were there questions that you found most impactful on that end? Are you feeling suicidal right now? Do you have a weapon? Do you have a plan? Do you have any objects to complete that plan with you right now? Are you comfortable being in a different room from it while we're having this conversation? When's the last time you slept? When's the last time you ate? Can we get some food in you? Can we take a walk? Do they know anything you're experiencing right now? If the roles were reversed and it were your partner or your cousin or your parent who were going through something like this, would you want them to tell you about it? Do you think they wanna know if you're going through a tough time? What if we had a space where we were all on the same page? Can you take a moment to go home and be a little more vulnerable with your roommate, partner, family, or neighbors? Can you take that skill with you into the rest of your life? How are you doing right now? How did you decide to do your first skip-the-small-talk event? When's the next one gonna be? Is this even possible? How do you have people switch partners in a way that makes sense online? How do we do this? What do you got for us? How do we do this for like hundreds of people? Can you talk about that story of where you pulled the questions from, and why you chose the different questions that you did? Where do you live? What do you like about where you live? What's the worst thing you've ever experienced? When's the last time you cried? When's the last time you experienced awe? What's something you're proud of that you don't normally get to share with people or that might not be on a resume? Specifically asking what are pieces of yourself that you don't normally get to share? What is a favorite ice cream? What was something that this organization has done right to help you? What do you think it is about the structure that allows for that to happen? What other elements are at play here? Finances would be a barrier, can you help me out? Do you wanna do it for free? Due to your position in society, does it make you more or less likely to go to prison? How can we do subtle things so that you don't have to necessarily out yourself as having an invisible disability, but still get your needs met? How can we make people with marginalized identities feel comfortable opening up? How do we make those spaces feel safer? What is your right now question? What makes an experience awesome? What makes storytelling awesome? Why was this moment so powerful? Why do we dim the lights a little at dinner parties What little things can you do to trick your physiology to be more immersed in an experience? Does doing a new novel activity with someone, trick your brain into being more excited about hanging out with someone? How can you make these memories more tactile? What does the tablecloth feel like? What do the napkins feel like? Can you just do five more of these? Can we do this throughout the year? What assumptions are you making about how much others want to know about your inner world, and how might testing those assumptions change your relationships? How might your community benefit from structured opportunities to practice deeper connection, and what role could you play in creating those spaces? If you treated meaningful conversation as essential to your health, as sleep or exercise, how would that change your daily priorities and choices? Are your questions designed to extract information or to create conditions where others can share the best parts of themselves?…

PRN: Pause, Renew, Next

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Welcome to PRN: Pause, Renew, Next, a podcast about soul-care, Scripture, and stories of faith. Join Ginny Detweiler, licensed counselor and lover of authentic conversation, to talk about practical soul-care tips, mental health, inspiring stories, books, relationships, and more. If you are looking for encouragement in your walk with Jesus, then this podcast is for you.

100 episode

#Religion #Christianity #Ginny Detweiler #Fitness #Podcasting Education #Self-Improvement #Mental Health #Soul Care

PRN: Pause, Renew, Next

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100 episode

#Religion #Christianity #Ginny Detweiler #Fitness #Podcasting Education #Self-Improvement #Mental Health #Soul Care

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PRN: Pause, Renew, Next

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Treasured Clay: A Conversation with April H. Cranford 36:10

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One of my favorite passages in the New Testament is 2 Corinthians 4, so you can imagine my delight when I found out that today’s guest, Rev. April H. Cranford, recently led her church through a worship series about this passage. They called it the Treasured Clay Worship Series. She says,”throughout the series, we explored the divine power that resides within us as clay pots, each of us carrying the treasure of Christ.” In this episode, April and I explore themes of disability, worship, advocacy, leadership, and soul-care. I’m really thankful for this conversation, and I hope you come away with a renewed gratitude for the body of Christ. If you enjoy this conversation and you’d like to know more about April or sign up for her substack, you can visit her website: aprilhcranford.com . This is the last episode of Season 7, and I’m so thankful to have spent another season with you. I’m taking off the summer to spend time with my children, but Lord willing, I’ll be back with Season 8 in August. Enjoy your summer! May you be encouraged on your journey with Jesus!…

PRN: Pause, Renew, Next

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Soul-Care Reflections: To Be In Process 17:26

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What does it mean to be in process? As we prepare to wrap up Season 7 of the podcast, I’m offering some reflections on what it means to be a human in process. We’ll also circle back around to some themes that we’ve talked about this season. I hope that you come away from this episode seeing your own humanity and transformative journey with a little more grace.…

PRN: Pause, Renew, Next

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Soul-Care Reflections: A Scripture Meditation on Resurrection & Suffering 20:54

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It’s been a couple of months since we did a Scripture meditation together, and it seems fitting to focus on themes of suffering and resurrection this week as we approach Easter. We’ll begin our time together with a breath prayer and then transition into the reflection and meditation time. If you’d like to follow along in your Bible, we’ll be reading Philippians 3: 7-16 together, and we’ll spend the most time on verses 10 and 11. May you be encouraged on your journey with Jesus.…

PRN: Pause, Renew, Next

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Understanding Kids with Big Behaviors: A Conversation with Fran Ballengee, LCMHC 34:23

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If you know a child with big, baffling behaviors, then today’s episode is for you! If you don’t, stick around, because this conversation will open your eyes to the reasons behind behaviors you may have dismissed as being a result of “willful behavior” or “bad parenting.” I am so grateful for my guest today, Fran Ballengee, LCMHC. She has become an expert on this subject working with children for many years as a licensed counselor. She also comes to this topic with personal experience, which she shares about on today’s episode. Fran is a gem, and I benefitted so much from this conversation. I think you will too! Resources talked about in today’s podcast episode: Robyn Gobbel’s book, Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors and her podcast, The Baffling Behavior Show Dr. Mona Delahooke’s books, Beyond Behaviors and Brain-Body Parenting Stephen Porges, Ph.D.’s work on Polyvagal Theory The works of Bruce Perry, M.D., Ph.D . May you be encouraged on your journey with Jesus!…

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In Process: Asking Questions 15:34

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When’s the last time you were curious? To be human means you are a question asker, and in today’s episode we’re going to reflect together on both the beauty and the frustration of this process. I hope you come away from this episode with a new perspective on learning. May you be encouraged on your journey with Jesus.…

PRN: Pause, Renew, Next

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Cultivating Joy: A Conversation with Josh Howlett, LCMHC 43:10

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In this podcast episode, I’m joined by my colleague Josh Howlett, to talk about an often mentioned, but little understood emotion, joy. Josh embodies joy, and I’m so thankful he could join us to share his perspective on this subject. We talk about cultivating joy, the importance of joyful movement, and Josh shares what it means to enjoy and be enjoyed by God and others. Before he was a counselor, Josh worked in pastoral ministry. In our conversation, he tells the story of how he transitioned into the counseling field. He also shares some of the wisdom he’s gained doing marriage counseling. I think you’re really going to enjoy this conversation! May you be encouraged on your journey with Jesus.…

PRN: Pause, Renew, Next

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In Process: Ruptures Within 13:28

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Ruptures can occur in all of our relationships, but have you ever considered that you can have ruptures within your relationship with yourself as well? Today, we’re continuing our series on being a human in process by examining this idea. We’ll also talk a bit about the importance of attunement and grace. If you enjoy this episode, and you’d like to hear more about the rupture and repair cycle, you can go back and listen to my previous episode on this topic: Rupture and Repair . Additionally, the Being Known Podcast has a whole series about Rupture and Repair in their Season 11. May you be encouraged on your journey with Jesus.…

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In Process: Considering Worry & Anxiety 24:15

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Today, we’re continuing our theme of being a human in process, by considering normal human emotions and reactions that tend to come up as we are navigating life as a human on planet earth. Particularly, we’re looking at emotions and reactions related to the fight/flight response. In January we talked about anger, fear, and stress, and today we’re turning our attention to worry and anxiety. In this episode, I’ll talk about how anxiety and fear are different, the importance of felt safety, how we can experience anxiety and worry differently depending on our background and personality, a little of what the Bible has to say on these topics, and a few ideas for how we can derail our brains from the cycle of rumination. May you be encouraged on your journey with Jesus.…

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In Process: Considering Fear & Stress 19:58

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Today we’re looking at the other half of the fight or flight response by considering fear and stress. What are they? What purpose do they serve? In what ways are they often misunderstood? We’ll talk about all of this and also look at some examples of where fear shows up in the Bible. As always, we’ll begin by doing a slow down exercise and end with a benediction. Next time, we’ll dig a little deeper by talking about anxiety and worry. May you be encouraged on your journey with Jesus.…

PRN: Pause, Renew, Next

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In Process: Considering Anger 24:37

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Today we’re considering an often misunderstood but necessary emotion, anger. Being a human in process means that we will experience a variety of emotions, both comfortable and uncomfortable. In the next couple of episodes, we’ll be covering some of the less comfortable emotions. In this episode, I’d like to talk about anger, what it is, the purposes it serves, and the ways that it is often misunderstood, especially in faith arenas. Over the course of this episode, I also reference two past PRN episodes, as well as an episode of the Vox podcast. I will link to those below, in case you want to listen to any of them. May you be encouraged on your journey with Jesus! Rupture and Repair: Episode #123 Attachment and Authenticity: Episode #129 Given to Anger: Voxology podcast (The part I reference in this episode comes around the 15-25 minute mark.)…

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Looking Up: A Conversation with Courtney Ellis 47:07

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If you love birds or nature, then you are really going to enjoy today’s conversation with guest, Courtney Ellis, about her new book, Looking Up: A Birder’s Guide to Hope Through Grief . This is such a great episode about ministry, grief, mindfulness, and soul-care. It’s also sprinkled throughout with great bird facts! Courtney is a such a fun person and she wears a lot of hats! She’s an author, a pastor, and a podcaster. If you listen to this episode and find yourself wanting to know more about Courtney, her podcast, and her book, you can visit her website: courtneybellis.com . She’s also a great follow on instagram or threads! May you be encouraged on your journey with Jesus.…

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Psalms of New Orientation 17:56

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Today, we conclude our series on the Psalms by examining Psalms of new orientation. We’ll be looking for signs of life, of rescue, of reversal of fortune, and of thanksgiving as we meditate upon Psalms 34 together. What is clear in all of these Psalms of new orientation is that there is a celebration of the coming of God, who now establishes new rule. So this week, on the second week of Advent as we focus our attention on peace, we can remember that the Prince of Peace himself, came to be with us. He came to take his people from a place of distance and disorientation into a new orientation of rescue, redemption, and new life. May you be encouraged on your journey with Jesus.…

PRN: Pause, Renew, Next

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Psalms of Disorientation 19:21

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We’re continuing our series on the Psalms and what they teach us about being a human in process. Today, we’re talking about psalms of disorientation. These are songs of darkness, of grief, of anger, of lament, and of complaint. These psalms answer the question of how we might worship and pray when our world is in disarray. Walter Brueggemann writes, “The use of these psalms of darkness may be judged by the world to be acts of unfaith and failure, but for the trusting community, their use is an act of bold faith, albeit a transformed faith.” As we enter the first week of Advent, the candle signifies hope. We know that in Christ we don’t grieve as those who have no hope. In fact, my favorite quote about psalms of disorientation is, “Because this One has promised to be in the darkness with us, we find the darkness strangely transformed, not by the power of easy light, but by the power of relentless solidarity.” In this episode, I referenced a previous podcast episode about Authenticity and Attachment. You can find that podcast episode here . Information and quotes in this episode come from the book, Spirituality of the Psalms by Walter Brueggemann. May you be encouraged on your journey with Jesus.…

PRN: Pause, Renew, Next

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Psalms of Orientation 18:49

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Today we continue our series on the Psalms and learning what they teach us about being a human in process. We’ll be meditating on a psalm of orientation today, Psalm 19. Psalms of orientation evoke gratitude for the blessings of creation and God’s good law. It just so happens that we’ll be reading this on the week of Thanksgiving, which is fitting! If you missed last week’s episode, I hope you’ll go back and give it a listen as it gives a good overview of Walter Brueggemann’s ideas about Psalms of Orientation, Disorientation, and New Orientation. May you be encouraged on your journey with Jesus.…

PRN: Pause, Renew, Next

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Orientation, Disorientation, and New Orientation 19:35

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We might call this mini-series, “where faith meets mental health.” More specifically, we would call it, “where worship and prayer meet mental health.” For the next few weeks, we are going to be diving into the Psalms and examining them through Walter Brueggemann’s lens of orientation, disorientation, and new orientation. This framework beautifully encapsulates being a human in process, and what that can look like in different seasons of our faith. In this episode, I’ll be giving an overview of orientation, disorientation, and new orientation. We’ll also talk about how this idea intersects with the gospel story. Then, over the next three episodes, we’ll be taking them one at a time and meditating on a Psalm from each of these categories. Quotes from Walter Brueggemann in this podcast episode came from his book, Spirituality of the Psalms. May you be encouraged on your journey with Jesus.…

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